While she’s in Poland, she longs for Paris, but while in Paris, she longs for Poland, even though, after the ‘uncanny glow of the setting sun’, a Stalinist night had just fallen upon the country. Marek Beylin, the artist’s biographer, attributed this to her wartime experiences – her effusive admiration for certain aspects of communist Poland did not, in his opinion, result from short-sightedness or political fanaticism, but was a means of escaping her post-war trauma. It was necessary so that she could ‘feel like a full participant in reality’ and ‘erase the horrific humiliation of humanity that had just occurred’. Although Paris had been a source of inspiration for many artists in the interwar period while Poland had offered a relatively peaceful existence, education, and opportunities to exhibit their work, the situation was quite the opposite for Szapocznikow – Paris offered opportunities and peace of mind, but it was Poland, even under Bierut, that provided scope for her imagination.
In 1952, after returning to Poland, Szapocznikow and Stanisławski got married and adopted a son. Her career began to take off. She was given a flat and several studios, and she sold many of her works to public collections. By the standards of that time, she was well-off – she even indulged in the bourgeois luxury of employing a housekeeper. Yet this was nothing compared to the material luxuries available on the other side of the Iron Curtain. After spending just a few years back in Poland, Szapocznikow once again became enchanted by Paris during a brief holiday – as if she were setting foot there for the very first time again. She was seduced by the capitalist glamour, the shop window displays, the scent of perfume, and the delicious coffee available at every street corner.
She spent over a decade in Poland, and during that time she gained recognition throughout Europe. She took part in international symposiums, exhibited in many countries, and was one of the Polish artists featured at the Venice Biennale in 1962. Following the breakdown of her marriage to Stanisławski, which was officially dissolved in 1958, Szapocznikow became romantically involved with the graphic artist Roman Cieślewicz, who took over as artistic director of the newly created magazine Ty i Ja in 1959 and, shortly after emigrating in 1963, went on to enjoy a spectacular career in the West.
In Poland, Szapocznikow was supported primarily by her mother. When her mother died, she began to think about Paris again. After a decade in Warsaw, the city had begun to feel stifling – she could never be anything there other than a big fish in a small pond. The only risky aspect was that after venturing out into wider waters, she might turn out to be nothing more than a minnow.