I’m only fighting with you because I like you
In Poland there’s a saying that goes more or less ‘With those you like, you fight’. It expresses the simple truth that an interpersonal relationship based on actual liking often involves a bit of friendly quarrelling. This saying’s spirit harmonises with the general style of recent Polish video game Oh Sir…!! The Insult Simulator.
Available on Steam, Google Play and iTunes, the game, as the name suggests, revolves around affronting people. Pitting two interlocutors against one another to deliver witty and hilarious insults, it encourages players to practise dexterity in verbal competition. Despite what the title might imply, it can be enjoyed with friends and family members. At least with those who occasionally indulge in a surrealist sense of humour…
‘Your dad dances like a hamster’
Screenshot from Oh Sir! The Insult Simulator, photo: promo materials The game is by no means an opportunity to throw around language that would make your grandmother faint, as it isn’t about cussing or producing mindless hate. An early version of it was described by its creators at Warsaw-based indie studio Vile Monarch as a title in which ‘even the harshest insult is classy’. Inspired by Monty Python sketches, the game is filled with ridiculous humour and contains rather mellow affronts which aim for laughs rather than hurt. You can be sure that once the dust of the battle settles, you’ll be perfectly happy to look your opponent in the eye and give them a handshake.
Oh Sir is really pretty simple and that’s part of its charm. There’s a couple of background settings (e.g. a pet store with a dead parrot inside – a clear nod to Monty Python) where two characters, chosen from a brief list of traditionally British types (many with excellently outdated facial hair) duke it out. The Britishness is emphasised even further by the fact that characters have the option of taking a sip of tea in-between insults. The game’s retro 2D graphic design highlights the overall silliness and light-heartedness of the whole affair, as does the music.
Grammar is no joke
Screenshot from Oh Sir! The Insult Simulator, photo: promo materials Words and short expressions appear in the middle of the screen that challenge you to use them. For example, ‘your house’ and ‘looks like’, from which both you and your opponent draw in turn, striving to construct the possibly most insulting sentence about the appearance of your opponent’s home. Once you complete your chosen insult, the game puts the whole thing into a human voice which works nicely thanks to the frisky voice acting.
To what extent you get under your rival’s skin depends on a few things: the general quality of your insult and whether it includes combos (e.g. dissing something twice) or references the current setting. Also, each character is overly sensitive regarding certain issues, and if you address them, it gives your affront extra punch. For example, Mr J. Shufflebottom is particularly sensitive about his fashion sense, so talking smack about his bowler hat will do wonders.
There is an important rule to this mischievous contest which grammar purists will love – the sentences you create must be grammatically correct (the game is entirely in English). The content can be utterly ridiculous or surreal, like when you call somebody a hovercraft, but the grammar needs to be sound.
Insult people around the world
Screenshot from Oh Sir! The Insult Simulator, photo: promo materials The friendly vibe of Oh Sir may have something to do with the fact that it originated as a hot-seat game, namely one where players take turns on the same computer. That early version, created at a game jam a year ago, simply had to be mellow enough for it to be enjoyable for two persons in the same physical space. And indeed it was – at the said event, AmJam, the game won an audience award, showing that the folks at Vile Monarch have a talent for development.
The studio’s talent should come as no surprise since the studio was founded by Kacper Kwiatkowski and Grzegorz Mazur, two gentlemen who worked on the highly-acclaimed Polish game This War of Mine. A slightly version of the game jam prototype later ended up on Steam as freeware and was soon downloaded tens of thousands of times, receiving many positive reviews. The newest incarnation, Oh Sir…!! The Insult Simulator, is a continuation of that original game, a far more developed one with unlockable characters (including Lo Wang from Shadow Warrior 2 by fellow Polish studio Flying Wild Hog) and, most importantly, the option of challenging other people on the Internet. Thankfully, the online multiplayer is multi-platform so typically you’ll find somebody to insult whenever you’re in need of it. How delightful!
All of this seems like a bargain when you consider the title costs less than 2 Euros. One would have to be a buffoon, or perhaps a nincompoop, to think otherwise.